Living With Purpose – by Matt Dobson

Halfway through a romantic dinner, a husband smiled and said to his wife, “You look so beautiful under these lights.”  She was falling in love all over again when he added, “We got to get some of these lights!” Our perception of beauty has a way of dictating how we feel about one another. It’s a challenge to separate ourselves from all that the world says is beautiful and what really is beautiful on the inside.

I know that someone who really cares, someone who really loves another person, will always find something beautiful in their special friend’s eyes. They are what we might call “charming”. These are people we like to be with or spend time with. They are friendly, helpful, and inviting. Naturally, if they are women, men like them and are attracted to them. If they’re men, women admire them and seek them out. Every one of us has the potential to be that kind of person. No matter what your age, education, or appearance in certain “lighting”, you can exude radiance and attract others to yourself.      I believe God wants you to be like that. Jesus was this kind of person. It was because he was in contact with the source of radiance. When Christ becomes your Savior, you gain the secret to eternal youth in the form of eternal life. People are in search of these things. Jesus is the way to eternal life. As far as eternal youth is concerned—you are only as young as you feel. So, take care of yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally. Nature and time tend to reward you if you do.

Jesus has a way of awakening the real you, the positive personality you were created to be. In the company of Jesus, you begin to feel better, you look better; you see all the wonderful potential not just in you, but in others too. This is why people were so attracted to Jesus and wanted to be near him. He treated one another with love. He made them feel special and purposeful. Jesus said, many times, that he was “the Way”—the way to life, the way to God, and the pathway to joy in this life. Jesus said, “…So that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be complete” (John 15:11). Jesus’ secret was never meant to be hid from us. We can promote this same joy through our life. He also said, “I am not alone, because the Father is with me” (John 16:32). God, the creator of the universe longs to be with you too. When this happens, we know from Scripture, “nothing is impossible” (Luke 1:37).

Often we are led to believe by Satan and others that we are all alone. The problems, the neglect, the rejection, the stings of life prevent us from ever being joyful and attractive to other people. You are not alone! The gospel message, which Jesus brings to us, can make you sure, confident, and unafraid to be your wonderful self. Don’t be like a darkened house, with barred doors and windows and the shades pulled down. That’s isolation and it says one thing—“Nobody’s Home!” Seek people out with joy. Be like a house on a hill with the front porch light on—inviting, full of positive thinking and the door open to all who come for help and fellowship. These are the kind of people who are radiant, happy, and attractive. These are the people who are Christ-like, possessing the power of God in their bodies and their minds.

Feeling unattractive, not wanted, or not needed can be devastating psychologically. Even if you’re shy, different, or uncomfortable around a crowd, you can make yourself natural and pleasing toward others. The degree to which you are wanted or needed by others will help you become a whole person and one that does not suffer from insecurity. If you feel useless or that nobody needs you, you are in the wrong place mentally. You need to do something about it! Renew your mind! The Bible says you are “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14). Age has no monopoly on charm, attractiveness, or influence. The secret is deeper than that. It is the Spirit of God which has the power to make you attractive, charming, and magnetic. The amount of godliness within you is that thing which sets you apart and makes you a valuable part of God’s plan.

Perhaps you think your nose is shaped funny, your ears are too big, your feet are too long, or you’re self-conscious about the clothes you have to wear. Let me remind you of the words from 1 Peter 3:3-4: “…Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” This is what matters most. And you need to know God loves you just the way you are! If you desire for someone to need you or want you in their life—surely God has a plan for that too. Take heart in this and trust God. Discover real hope in a Bible-believing church, attend faithfully, and follow God in all of your ways.

• This weekly column is written by Matthew Dobson. A graduate of Florida State University, University of West Florida, and Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary, he is Pastor of New Bethel Baptist Church in Jay, Florida. Matthew can be reached by email:  rmdobson@liberty.edu. He welcomes your thoughts and questions concerning faith, belief, and Christian living. Visit the Living With Purpose website at www.living-with-purpose.org.